Red-light cameras, ahoy! Just another step toward a day when we have to put on our safety helmets to get out of bed in the morning, and only after having signed a notarized affidavit that anything done within that same bed the night before was fully consensual, non-discriminatory, in total compliance with all ADA regulations, properly permitted by local authorities, undertaken only after ensuring all taxes on the location were paid in full, all participants had passed a health screening beforehand, and all legal documents pertaining to the potential results of the activities within same bed on prior evening had been read, signed, and dated, before undertaking the authorized removal of one’s safety helmet and initiation of any activities that perhaps might involve another kind of safety helmet anything at all.